It started with a movie.
Horror and suspense are subjects I enjoy,
And it's just a movie, right?
So I sat down and rocked back and forth,
Nearly shaking with anxiety over something fake.
It's a buzz in my pocket.
The screen shows me something I don't want to see,
And worse yet, the time does the same.
Finally, it's the car ride home in the dark.
Songs I don't know nor understand screech over the sounds in my head,
Taking over my thoughts.
That was all I needed to cr ack.
Then, I'm home, but I'm not at the same time.
Rush to the bathroom, look in the mirror, try to remember who I am.
Repeating simple truths to myself as I taught myself to do.
Over and over again, saying my name, and yet the face in the mirror doesn't quite match up.
So I escape the bathroom and go into my room,
But it's unfamiliar to me now.
So I count senses, look at what I can see, try to ground myself,
But it's far too late.
So, I sit down and curl up on my bed, rocking back and forth.
It's too late.
I already crac ked.
I look around a room that seems foreign to me.
The desk is too small,
The shelf isn't long enough.
The floor looks like it's rising up and trying to attack me;
My slippers are lightyears away from me.
Everything is distorted,
And all I can think is,
"What's happening to me?"
Eventually, it goes away,
And the crack seals itself.
But the fear of it never goes away,
Knowing that I will crack again somed ay.
I realize that this is less of a poem and more of a story, so forgive me for that. I just felt the need to share this experience. Thanks for reading!- Kitten