Maybe it started when she was nine.
Maybe that's when her mind drew the line.
Everything in life had a new purpose, a new light.
She no longer wanted to fight.
Not for herself, at least.
Instead, she fought for a new beast.
Approval was its name,
A monster that would soon become her bane.
Her world started to crumble before her eyes,
As she began to solve problems with cries.
Tears would fall when any problem existed,
And they would keep falling as the problem persisted.
Even things that weren't big deals at all would cause the tears to fall.
Eventually, she created a system of rules to follow in her mind,
A way to put everything in line.
There was a method to the madness in her brain,
But it didn't mean she wasn't going insane.
Fighting for approval and fearing the loss of it birthed the creation of her biggest fixation:
She started to hate the girl in the reflection.
A girl that could never gain the approval she wanted;
followed by a beast that continued it's haunting.
It still follows her now.
I wish it didn't follow me now.