6:00 AM alarm buzzes.
“Looks like I made it another day, hopefully this will be a better day.”
I roll out of bed and made my cup of liquid heaven. Two thirds Hawaiian Hazelnut coffee and one third hazelnut creamer; I couldn’t ask for anything better.
I harvest my phone from its charging spot on my bed. I push the lock button with a hopeful attitude.
“Maybe I’ll have a message from someone or a new follower request on Instagram.”
“Can’t say that I’m surprised, no one ever really talks to me.”
I take my paperweight of a phone to the bathroom as I scroll through my “Sad Songs” playlist. I pick a song to play and rest my phone atop the bathroom counter.
I step out of the shower directing the stray water beads onto the mat. As I go to grab my phone, I catch a quick glimpse of myself. Skin, bone, and soul exposed; showing the most of me.
“Ugh. I should go as a skeleton for Halloween, I wouldn’t have to do much other than take my shirt off.”
I slip my slacks on and button every button on my dress shirt, covering myself from the neck down. Strapping my watch on and finishing my outfit to the smallest details.
The screen of my watch brightens up and there I see a picture of my ex.
“You know she hates you right?”
“Why did I even make her my wallpaper?”
“God, I miss you.”
A sudden wave of grief consumes me as if I was in a sand storm. I take a seat on my bed without breaking focus on my watch.
The longer I stared at the picture the more I felt myself detaching from reality. I felt like I was underwater. The sounds of an idle house slowly drowning out to an eerie silence.
“I’m so lonely.”
“I was a loser and I still am a loser.”
“I wish I didn’t have to wake up anymore.”
I looked up from my watch because I felt a strong grasp around my neck and see myself in an empty dark room, surrounded by nothing.
Not a single soul, not a single heartbeat, and not a single smile anywhere in my life.
“I don’t want to do this anymore.”
Returning to my body, I began to gasp for air as I looked down to see my feet dangling over a chair that’s been knocked down.
As I drew my final gasps of air, I realized my greatest fear came true.
I didn’t make it another day and I died the way that I lived, alone.