before i begin, i'd like to make sure that it is understood that this is my own personal analysis of this poem, this is simply where i came from when i wrote this poem, and if your interpretation of the poem is completely different, that's completely okay! i'd love to hear your interpretations in the comments below!!
this poem is a sequel to my poem "permanent ink", which i am almost certain that i have not posted on commaful yet, because idk why, but i prefer for my readers to read "simple punctuation error" first, so i will probably post "permanent ink" soon (hopefully next week) but here we go w the analysis!
i used to believe that the only reason people have not forgotten their past lovers is bc they wrote their stories in permanent ink, which bled onto their future pages (i will get more into that after i post permanent ink and its analysis) but in short, it symbolizes that they allowed for their past lovers to continue to affect them, even after they used/abused them.
even after the relationship ended. even after the illusion of love ended.
but i go on to say that i have passed all the pages that your ink has bled onto (which symbolize the days after the breakup, the days after i should have already gotten over you), but i still think of you from time to time.
i still think of the splinters you left in my skin (sort of referencing that i now use pencil when i write my story), i still remember the pain you continue to cause me, instead of moving on and forgetting.
i look deeper into the fact that, while i now write in pencil, so that my past no longer bleeds into my future (and affects my future decisions), you keep making your way back into my life, into the margins of my tattered notebook. the tattered notebook that you helped tear and ruin.
i continue to find myself looking back out our old memories and revisiting our past. the past we shared together, and wondering why i continue to do this to myself.
as a sort of "method to my madness" i suggest that i might have brought back you into my life due to a simple mistake.
in the chaos of it all, i must have placed a semicolon at the end of our relationship. as a safety blanket of sorts, i reassured myself that the possibility of us should remain to be seen. should not be thrown out immediately.
in the moment, i must have hoped for us to be a continuation, instead of an end. but now i am suffering the effects of leaving open the possibility of us, instead of ending us and leaving us in the past. instead of letting myself move on.
*announcement* you can still join my taglist at any time (ik i am getting annoying w this, but i just want any new readers to know they can join hehe) also, i will be posting the q&a, as promised, sometime this coming week, so keep an eye open for that ilysm and i hope you have a great rest of your day xx