Prone to panic it's manic, can't stand it, a lunatic in disguise I keep quite in the eyes of the unknown.
Barriers set in stone, unable to siege the inner workings of a man who had potential but who has never grown.
Just skin and bones.
A skeleton in the closet can't pause it, cant turn back time to the day that I lost it.
But there's no profit in dwelling on fuck ups just stop it and focus on the immediate roadblocks just toss it.
Can't tell if the shakes are from withdrawls or all the coffee I've ingested, I've been bested by a better life in reach if I can breach the past, hold fast and steady the broken mast, this ship can still sail no matter how choppy the waves I won't fail.
No matter the barrier I'll carry 'er I will not break, even if it's scarier to go this path alone. Atone for my mistakes and open the gates I must push through the rapid current and earn it.
I will never fall, fuck it all. Cock the hammer don't stammer let the anger resonate within and swing down again like I used to.
Get loud get proud, obliterate the persona before myself and get down and dirty, turn the key and open the door to be free, I will come back from the brink of insanity.
Oh calamity, coming from a place so pathetic don't let it define the person I am becoming, it's stunning how much I've accomplished in such little time,
don't forget the night I drew the line and forged a better me.
Created and crafted to be drafted to a better place in existence without the assistance of the bottle, throttle the ravenous hunger, malicious blunder,
be vindictive in my approach to silence the once overpowering thunder.
Under the influence of a newfound tenacity but life laughs at me, captures me, and spastically throws nothing but cold stones and wishbones to set the tone of living without a crutch.
But I can feel the touch of something grander, no delusions of grandeur, I'll better myself and become commander of my own fate.