It hurts to breathe and my heart feels heavy, I look for a way out but I can’t find one. Everything around me is pitch black, there’s no light, no way out, and yet again I’m alone trapped in my own sadness and despair.
Who can I turn to when I have no one, I feel like a burden to everyone I’ve ever met... I don’t understand the meaning of my life and just want to end it but then again I’m scared of what I might find at the end of the road, will it be equally or more lonely than my life right now.
I sometimes don’t understand why I feel so much pain, I wish I could turn off all my emotions but then again isn’t that what makes me human? But if being human means being in pain is it all really worth it?
I sometimes reminisce on my childhood memories, I was happy but what changed?? I’ve come to understand that my hero and idol doesn’t love me but why? Am I that unlovable?
She was once the only person I looked up to and aspired to be but why does she the one person I cared and loved the most in this world... WHY DOES SHE NOT LOVE ME?!?
I sit in my room and grasp at the old memories, I try to cling on to anything I possibly can. I feel as if I’m hanging by a thread and to be completely honest I’m almost about to let go, I’m reaching my limit.
Will it be selfish if I just let go, is it ok for me to leave? How can I know if I will be missed when I feel like my existence is irrelevant I’m one person would it really make a difference?
I think you broke my heart again, I wish you could take my hand and ask me to stay but that not the case. Can’t you stay with me? Can’t you hug me and tell me how much you love me? Can you please tell me I matter and you will miss me if I’m gone?
Why should I feel like this? Why should I go through this? If I had a past life what did I do to deserve all this pain and sorrow?