If I Were a Happy Poet
If I Were a Happy Poet button poetry stories
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vbrosseau
vbrosseau Community member
Autoplay OFF   •   6 months ago
"Write a happy poem", He says.

If I Were a Happy Poet

"Write a happy poem",

He says.

"Because you make me happy."

But the dark is so compelling,

Like its own gravity, like a restless beast circling its cage.

The lows are like driving home,

Realizing you're there

And not remembering the drive at all.

I write when the pain

Is like the whistle of an old kettle,

The sting of a new sunburn,

The smell of campfire on your favourite sweater.

I write when I'm clawing my way up from the bottom,

Or when I've resigned myself to being there.

Maybe that's why I haven't been writing.

I've been happy.

And maybe happy means treading carefully

In the penumbra of my illness,

Maybe it means I don't want to kill myself today.

I'm not a happy poet,

But if I were,

I'd write about long walks and the crisp fall air

And breathing in a million possibilities.

About how you wink at me like you know something

My heart knows better than my head.

I'd write about forehead kisses like butterflies,

Like a ray of sun through a cold window.

I'm not a happy poet,

But if I were,

I'd write about how you're my favourite.

I'd write about how I wish we could spend more time together

But forever is a long time.

About how forever never seemed to be coming

But now it's all I can think about.

I'm not a happy poet,

But I can try.

I'm not a happy poet,

But you make me want to be.

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