he gave me compliments, but it didn’t matter if he would have gave me the deepest seas filled with jewels and heartfelt poems, I could never truly baptize the sins of me
the sins of loving someone who even with two hearts, would never be filled, even with two souls, never have compassion, even with two bodies, mine lifeless on the ground, he would never be able to experience the crushing reality of his actions. And I hate him for it
I hate his affect on me. I hate that I can’t leave. I hate that I believe he’ll change every-time. I hate that I always get hurt. I hate the tears I cry. I hate the gut wrenching feeling in the pit of my stomach. I hate the memories. I hate remembering. I hate myself for always forgiving him. I hate that he’s never the one crying.
He says he loves me
And it is not that I don’t believe. It is that no matter how much he hurts me, I will never leave. For the fact he does love me and someone who loves wouldn’t do this. It’s just his way of showing he loves Right ? Right.