My "Secret" Celebrity Crushes
My "Secret" Celebrity Crushes sexy stories

tbanarchy Sometimes serious, mostly snarky author.
Autoplay OFF   •   3 years ago
I started this post off with about a half-dozen listings and it just kept growing from there!ce

My "Secret" Celebrity Crushes

by tbanarchy

Let's face it, we ALL have "questionable" celebrity crushes!

We all have famous people we "crush" on that we don't share sometimes even with our closest friends for fear of them ridiculing you. Here are a few of my own. (I'm a glutton for punishment!)

Khloe Kardashian

While I'm certainly NO fan of the Kardarshians, I do admit to having a little thing for Khloe. At least she actually admitted to Barbara Walters how she & her sisters have NO discernible talent!

Miley Cyrus

Miley Cyrus takes a lot of heat for her, uh-hum, antics (like her infamous "twerking" on MTV). The former Disney star has been denounced as a "bad" role model & mentally disturbed (and worse).

Rose McGowan

The former Charmed actress-& Marilyn Manson gf!-has in recent years said she no longer wants to be considered a "sex symbol" while at the SAME time posing nude for magazines like Flaunt. Oh well!

Lindsay Lohan

Lindsay Lohan has been a mainstay on TMZ for years with her personal & professional, shall we say, antics. Which, of course, may explain why we don't see her do a whole lot of "acting" nowadays.

Elizabeth Berkley

The former Saved By The Bell star is STILL getting flak for her (mostly naked!) role in the VERY controversial 90s flick Showgirls. (I wonder if it was the pole-licking people took "offense" to?)

Asia Argento

Asia Argento is an actress & also the daughter of legendary horror film director Dario Argento. Asia has appeared in movies-often sans clothes!-such as B. Monkey & the Vin Diesel vehicle XXX.

Stacey Dash

Stacey Dash has taken a lot of heat for her "conservative" political viewpoints and/or her stint on Fox (Non) News. You know what? I don't care WHAT her views are. She STILL looks hot as hell!

Claudia Christian

Claudia Christian is perhaps best known for her role in the "cult" sci-fi TV show Babylon 5. Claudia once said of herself how she's not a "conventional beauty" but that she "still turned heads".

Lisa Rinna

Lisa Rinna is perhaps best known for "those lips" than anything else except for maybe Dancing With The Stars. Oh yeah, she's also "known" for doing Playboy twice (once when she was pregnant!).

Felicia Day

Felicia Day is an actress who's starred in TV shows like Supernatural & was rumored to have been "involved" with Star Trek: TNG actor Wil Wheaton. #ShutUpWesley

Velma (from Scooby-Doo)

While other guys may have had the "hots" for Daphne, I've always been more of a Velma guy myself. And, yes, I do realize that I'm talking about a CARTOON character! (This IS a "secret" list!)

Kelly Osbourne

Kelly Osbourne is, of course, the daughter of infamous rocker Ozzy. Kelly once said she'd like to be in Playboy to which Hugh Hefner reportedly said there wasn't enough airbrushing. Nice, Hef!

Alexa Ray Joel

Alexa Ray Joel is the daughter of singer Billy Joel & model Christie Brinkley. Alexa is a singer in her own right. Sadly, she tried to commit suicide once & got plastic surgery afterwards.

Fairuza Balk

Fairuza Balk is best known for her roles in the films The Craft & The Waterboy (with Adam Sandler back when he was STILL funny!). As for Fairuza, I've always had a thing for goth chicks myself!

Christina Ricci

I've always thought Christina Ricci-who's perhaps best known for playing the character Wednesday in the Addams Family flicks-looked kind of like Rose McGowan (WITHOUT the "political" bent!).

Ellen Page

I've been a fan of Ellen Page for a while now. She's best known for her roles in flicks like Juno & Inception. Plus I think she looks HOT as a superhero (as she showed in those X-Men flicks!)!

Aubrey Plaza

Aubrey Plaza is a comedienne/actress who was in the show Parks & Recreation. I admit I haven't seen much of Aubrey's work but I consider her a "secret" crush because she has this "look" I like.

Patti Reagan Davis

Patti Reagan Davis is the daughter of the late president Ronald Reagan. Patti did something unprecedented for a president's daughter and posed NUDE in-where else!-Playboy back in the 90s.

Crista Flanagan

Crista Flanagan is perhaps best known for doing Mad TV & Mad Men. (Coincidence?) She also posed starkers for-where else!-Playboy some years back.


Kennedy was an MTV VJ (remember those?) back in the 90s & is now a "host" on the-gasp!-Fox "News" Channel. (Nobody's perfect!)

Katherine (Kat) Timpf

Kat Timpf if a writer for the National Review who also regularly appears on the-double gasp!-Fox "News" Channel. (Again, nobody's perfect!)

Meghan McCain

Meghan McCain is, of course, the daughter of senator-and former presidential candidate-John McCain. Batshit crazy rightie host Glenn Beck once pretended to vomit while discussing Meghan. NIce!

Jillian Michaels

Jillian Michaels is the celebrity fitness trainer who's best known for that "reality" show The Biggest Loser or whatever it's called.

Ani DiFranco

There are two reasons why I regard "independent" singer Ani DiFranco as a "secret" celeb crush: Hairy Armpits!

Clea Duvall

I don't believe Clea Duvall has gotten her just due not only as an actress but also as a "hottie"! Clea has starred in movies like The Faculty and in TV shows like American Horror Story.

Juliette Lewis

Juliette Lewis starred in the controversial flicks Natural Born Killers & Cape Fear (where she infamously sucked on Robert De Niro's thumb). She also "moonlights" as a rock singer (of sorts!).

Nadya/Natalie Suleman a.k.a. Octomom

"Octomom" gained national notoriety by having octuplets via in vitro fertilization (along with having six other kids). She gained further notoriety with the, uh-hum, release of her "adult" video.

Farrah Abraham

Farrah Abraham is a "reality" show/porn star who went from Teen Mom to Backdoor Teen Mom (& its "sequel").

Ilana Glazer

Ilana Glazer stars on the "hit" Comedy Central show Broad City. It was OK. But I must admit I wanted to spank it after seeing THIS scene of Ilana in the buff (albeit blurred). Is THAT wrong?

Sandra Bernhard

I once knew a guy who always gave me crap for having a "crush" on comedienne/actress Sandra Bernhard. But I gave him about as much crap for the chicks he banged so I guess THAT made us even!

Melania & Ivanka Trump

While Melania & Ivanka are indeed VERY attractive women, given the way some-or many-feel about you-know-who, they STILL might give you flak if you say you found them attractive, know what I mean?

And here's a parting, er, shot from Khloe Kardashian!

Yes, that Khloe Kardashian's REAL posterior! (And you STILL wonder why I have a "crush" on her!) Anyway, let me know who your "secret" celebrity crushes are in the comments (if you DARE!).

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