I never believed that it would all end this way.
End like this... This moment stretched thin and raw between my hands. Your voice aching and rough full of edges and sharp objects.
There's a door. The green door we painted together its layers chipping away. Losing the bright cheer it once wore so proudly.
It has to be a metaphor. It's almost poetic how our end came to be. Free of happily ever afters and big red bows. Filled with happy little aftershocks and big red flags. That's us.
You and me.
Why there is no longer a "we".
Maybe it was more me than you. Maybe it started with broken bookcases or overly salted eggs. Maybe it came from late night silences or mixed messages spelled out across the fridge.
Those things happened after. After you held a hand that wasn't mine. Touched a body that didn't belong to me. Met with lips and tongue without my name.
Was it worth it?
Twenty five minutes of hot breath and want and desire and intoxication and her and you and her and you...
I pause from my spiraling thoughts long enough to see the clarity in your green eyes.
I find my answer.
I knew it all along. I knew it last night when you were touching my body. I knew it yesterday when your footsteps lingered outside the door before coming home.
I knew it last week when your best friend glanced my way and handed me an extra beer at his party. I knew it when a month ago I smelled roses on the inside of your wrists and under your ear.
I knew it the night you stumbled through me after staggering through the door.
I knew it two months ago. We were sitting outside it was early May. The weather app had showed sun but didn't mention the wind bringing its chill.
I wore a dress for the first time since I've met you. My legs had goosebumps and my fingers felt numb. I was happy. We sat at a table sipping chilled wine and nibbling at overpriced cheeses.
You were incandescent and brilliant and full of wit and charm. Bright eyes only focused on me.
I must have shivered or stuttered because without a word you were taking off your sweater and handing it across the brie and crackers. I stopped talking momentarily stunned by the offer.
You just lifted a dark brow until I slipped it on over my head. You laughed at my messy hair and reached over to tuck a stray curl out of my eyes.
That's when I knew.
You were going to hurt. You were going to sting. You were going to cause me pain and sorrow and sadness. You were a train hurtling down a track. A fist flying through the air.
A bullet fired from a gun. The impact was approaching. Destruction was inevitable.
I knew all of this, but it didn't change a thing.
Because I would take the pain just to have this moment. Just to feel the warmth in your eyes and the burn in my chest.
It's a pleasure to be broken by you.
"Excuse me! Hey you! You dropped something!" A male voice called out making me stop my purposeful stride and turn around.
I didn't immediately see anything on the ground. "What was it? I don't see anything" I retorted eyeing the man with startling green eyes behind me.
"I know you did. Maybe it rolled over there?" Green eyes replied a grin threatening to appear on his face. His quite handsome face now that I'm seeing it.
"Ok...what was it? I hedge coming closer to the spot he pointed out and closer to him. Was that oak I smelled?
"No I know for sure now you dropped something. Something important I believe. Probably vital" he continued a smile now gracing his lips.
"What??" I asked in confusion and worry. Was it my credit card? Phone? No I have those right here in my pocket. My hands feeling the shapes.
"You dropped my jaw when you walked by" the man answered.
Wait what? Did he just?
"Did you just-" I began to speak before pausing. "You're hitting on me" I stated rather bluntly.
"I'm hitting on you" he repeated with a nod.
"Does this normally work for you?" I couldn't help but ask.
With a sheepish smile and a nervous scratch behind his head he replied. "Actually this is the first time. How am I doing?"
"Not too bad" I told him with a light chuckle.
"I'll take that" he accepted waggling his eye brows. "So what's your name beautiful stranger?"
"Melody" I answered with a smile. "And what's your name?"
"You can call me Finn" Finn told me while extending his arm. I thought for a moment we were going to shake hands but he surprised me at the last second by flipping it over.
He paused and it seemed like he was searching my face for something. He must have found it because he smiled wide and placed a warm kiss on my hand.
"It's a pleasure to meet you Melody."
"The pleasure is all mine Finn."