We met after bedtime at the meeting point, From there, we crept into the Church. Like little mice we sneak in, And duck behind the pews. I don't think anyone heard us, But we resist tootling the organ, just to be sure.
Tillerson is our leader, And so he is in the back. Georgie is our mapper, So Tillerson said he had to go first. I am in the middle, Because I am the smallest.
I begin to sing; 'We're going on a monk hunt, 'And we don't we know what we'll find, 'I hope it is a monk though, 'It's what we have in mind.' Tillerson tells me to shut up.
It was all Charlie's idea, But his mum said he couldn't come. I think she is a Buhddist. At least, she pretends to be. Living a vegan lifestyle and all, But Erika said she saw her necking a Big Mac by the school gates.
Anyway, we tip-toe down the aisle, Like very grubby brides, With bum fluff and body odour. When we reach the pulpit, Georgie grabs an unnecessarily large Bible, I think he's going to use it to knock out the monk.
I suggested a blowpipe, But we couldn't order them off the internet in time. Plus, it asked if we were 18, And Monica wouldn't let us use her fake I.D., So I told mum about her new boyfriend with the piercings. Monica is my sister, by the way.
Georgie says the bible is heavy, I try, and he is right. We decide to leave it with the Virgin Mary, Who is pretty trustworthy. Tillerson suggests we use a smaller bible, It's clever thoughts like these which mean he is the leader.
Georgie says the monk's dorms are to the right, So Georgie points left. We end up in the kitchen, That isn't so bad because we are quite hungry. But there are only stewed carrots about, I think that is called penance.
Eventually, we make it to the dorm, We creak open the door, We slither inside, We skitter to the first bed, We raise the smaller bible than the previous unnecessarily large bible, And...
'Oh bother,' Says Tillerson. It's the nunnery.