i once wrote an essay about love.
i spit those hopeful words onto the page thinking it would make the pain go away, and it did for a while.
until one day those chest pains tore at my body and asked why would i ever try to heal my wounded heart.
they ripped through me until they found someone else to bother, i should've been relieved but i found myself begging for the pain.
slowly I realized that i was better off without the constant headache, and right as it became easy to breathe the pain gripped my lungs just to remind me it was still there.
i could never understand how the warmth that made me feel at home could turn so cold and rough.
it's been a year of a constant battle for peaceful sleep and although the pain turned to comfort when it pleased, it was never enough.
I've experienced so much but have always found myself back to focusing on those damn chest pains, tonight i think I'm done.
maybe I'll sleep