My name is Breatta and I am a Cat. I want to run for president because, honestly you people have no idea how to properly rule your subjects.
I will make the most of your vote by not sending my heaviest cat to sleep on your face tonight, and by opening your eyes to the way you treat your 'pets.'
Your nation needs a cat to rule because we were once worshiped remember? And we can give this country ultimate power! Isn't that what you imperfect humans want?
The first thing I would do in power would be to change it to a Monarchy and if you argued something about The Constitution, we would say, "What constitution?" (We shredded it up yesterday, and peed on it and left some presents on it.)
Nap time would be a regular, look at the Mexicans! They know their stuff! Come on America! No one would get presents because you do not appreciate ours, how do you think we feel?
In conclusion, vote for me, Breatta, and you will not have to sacrifice any mice.
VOTE BREATTA! VOTE AMERICAT!