Soon, I will lose you.
Despite never actually having had you in the first place.
But it will feel like loss, nontheless.
Because I have imagined having you.
Fantasised about have you.
I have had moments. I had bits and pieces.
But I constantly wondered about the parts I never had. Never could have.
Like what it would be like to snuggle on the couch with you watching TV.
What it would be like to randomly wander off into a day with no plan to guide us. To share what I loved with you and to share the things that you love.
And of course, what it would be like to touch you. Kiss you. Make love.
We worked together. Travelled together. Laughed together. We cried on each other's shoulders. We provided support when there was none.
And I appreciate all those things.
And I understand that me losing you, is also probably the best thing for you. And maybe even for me.
But that doesn't make me hate it any less.
I miss you already.
Thank you for reading I welcome all your comments and feedback. Stay strong!