One of the things that I hear quite often is:
" judging is bad."
"You shouldn't judge a book by their cover."
That seems like something a psychopath would LOVE you to believe.
Admittedly, that is how psychos justify the things they do:
"if you are THAT naive, then you deserve to be taken advantage of."
(You should watch a couple of videos about a guy called Paul Bernardo so you can see how charming a killer usually is.)
But it is also something that those who are the complete opposite of a psychopath would say.
That would be the overly empathetic
When people take a slogan and start using it, they often don't realize that it only a symbol
Before a slogan can be useful to you, it's important that you fill it with meaning based on your experiences and observations.
otherwise, you are being possessed by the slogan, which is an ideology.
Another thing is: (roughly speaking) You could say there are two types of people:
Those with a tendency towards narcissism, and those who tend towards being sensitive (empathy)
Most of the advice that you see out there, was made for and BY people who were born tending towards narcissism.
That is not you. At all.
Your problem is the opposite, because your feelings are dependant on how those around you are feeling at that time.
That makes it very easy for you to believe that any and all negative emotions are bad, because they drown you in pain.
Which is why you believe that all forms of aggressive behavior are bad.
This problem with that particular belief is that it nurtures a whole LOT of resentment due to your tendency to give in.
To cope with and balance the resentment (which you make yourself blind to) you insist on your own natural Goodness
But because you ignore the resentment (evil) and blow up the good (delusion) you make yourself a target for nearly everyone else.
The reason you become a target is because you are refusing to stand up to yourself, which creates empty space around you.
Because the universe opposes a vacuum,( and most people are unaware) your personal space will be invaded 100%
No matter what you tell yourself, there are parts of you who will NOT be happy about that
And everytime you allow another person to step into your area, that anger will increase together with the victim identity.
Before you know it, you will become weak and scared, which will have you leaning towards overprotection.
Unless you integrate the shadow and aggression inside of yourself, your capacity to feel becomes a prison of nightmares.
I can tell you that because my capacity for empathy has expanded quite a lot and it nearly drove me mad in the past.
And since most people reading this are women, you might be wondering why you got some much anxiety in your life:
A probable reason for it is that women did not evolve to be happy, but to make sure their offspring remains alive.
That explains why women tend to be more anxious and sensitive than men. And will likely sacrifice themselves for peace.
Because any sort of physical altercation can bring harm to the baby she is caring for.
But what if the danger comes from the outside?
Then a woman needs to be able to have a man which can be aggressive
That means that women are simultaneously scared and deeply attracted to capacity for aggression that man can develop.
So much so, that they can not escape their attraction to Vampires and WereWolf stories in which the woman,
uses her power to tame the beast inside of the man and use it towards the benefit of all
(on a side note: Exactly for how long are we going to ignore the entire 50 Shades of Grey phenomena?)
Are you the kind of woman who can tame, and properly channel the aggression of a man?
To do that, you first need to call forth the masculine in you and use the feminine to tame it.
Fairy tales were never meant to say that a woman needs a man to save her
The male and female are representation of the masculine and feminine energies which dwell in all human beings.
Let's end the rant here. This was not what I had in mind to write but it just kind of came up.