"*Invents amazing new tech where, if you scan a dvd
that you own into the camera, the movie suddenly starts to begin.* #wastingtimewithdiscs"
I then added, "If you scan a dvd you don't own,
it plays a recording of your birth".
Satisfied, I rose and scanned the computer lab.
There he was again. This guy that spent way too much time there. But this time, he was crying. He was staring into the monitor, and tears were coming from his face.
Being an investigator of all things, I approached this human
and asked, "You ok, man?"
I mean, something must have happened, right?
"Did your gf just break up with you, online?" I asked. I tried to apply humor: "Heh. Maybe she faxed it to you, eh?"
He didn't even seem to see me.
Something had happened that was visually depicted to him on the monitor that I was not privy to. A new set of tears drained down his rosy cheeks, and now, he even sniffled a little.
"What? Did you just learn your mother died, or something?"
I touched him with my left boot. "You alright?," I asked. "What are you fucking crying about?"
"Just, cause, like, I have to spend a lot of time in this computer lab. I don't want your tears gradually causing a biological hazard that could injure my person."
Nothing. No response.
"Can I do something for you, to make you stop the crying?"
I asked. Incentives are always motivational.
Then something unexpected happened. Something unforeseen.
The man turned his head to me, and, with a little sniff, asked, "Yes. Can you get me a cola?" Then he turned his head back to the monitor, and continued with his weeping.
I had been meaning to go to the vending machine anyway.