I wish I could board a plane.
Not to any physical place.
A place where I can end all the pain.
I want to live to see the day, but the habits won't quit.
I want to change so bad, but I will never have strength to end it.
I'm hurting him, but mostly myself.
Might as well get two for one: end my life and the relationship.
I want to fly in a plane as high as I can.
Then come crashing down; rid myself of the toxicity I can't stand.
I want to leave on a jet plane.
Not on vacation, but to stay.
No matter how much I love you, I'll only hurt you in the end.
Worry not about me, you'll find real love that won't break or bend.
You're better off without me; I feel it in my gut.
With me tagging along, you might get stuck.
Though I may leave your side in a horrible way,
Know that "I love you" was the most honest thing I've said.
I'll see you again. This time, better and stronger. - Elohi