The Depressed Demon (A BPD Story)

A minuscule part of my emotion

In a minuscule box in my mind

Trying to break out just to hurt me

Fury without meaning, so blind

Just a part of who I am

But trapped in a tiny cage

Waiting for the doors to open

To unleash a hidden rage

You are not a person nor object

Simply a part of mine

And though I wish you wouldn't

You show yourself in many signs

The sudden waves of anger

The sudden flood of tears

The days I feel nothing but lazy

The days you make me look crazy

But perhaps I am

Just like you say

Because unlike the people close to me

I cannot run away

I am stuck living with you in my mind

Feeding off of the pain

I see no reason to do this to me

Its all for loss and not for gain

These symptoms I can't run away from

Or hide from or pretend aren't there

Must I simply face the reality

And live with this constant despair

But slowly I regain the power

To lock away parts of your pain

To make life a little easier on others

Though in my mind the troubles remain

The scars and the memories

Of mine and others the same

You, or I, or we I might say

Are the only ones to blame

I cannot say sorry for doing

The things that you force me to do

I can simply hope that they love me

Enough to see me through you

I write this message for you, my demon

To present my strong feelings of hate

For you, the one who controls me

No more will you decide my fate

So, minuscule part of my emotion

In a minuscule box in my mind

No longer will you break out to hurt me

I control you now, I think you'll find