i stumble to my bed, in the new bedroom
after you left i could not bear to sleep in our room. i could not bear to be there without you.
it was too full of the memories of us.
and i open the drawers that i keep the tokens of us.
crying, i had shut them away, too sentimental to throw them away, but too hurt to look at them every again.
and i dig them out with my bare hands, sobbing, my hands cut and bleeding from the wood and metal, and i start a fire.
i throw every piece of us into the flames.
my hands are bleeding, cut up and raw, and i should be crying because of the pain, but i am crying and sobbing and i am a stupid worthless mess because of you
no, because of me
because i was too weak to be still be me when you left.