Secret Alliance Base
Since I was grounded for a long time I was doomed to practice several hours in a simulator. As if someone can unlearn how to fly. But I was glad that I was allowed to fly again.
If they had taken that from me as well, then I would have hold a blaster to my head and pulled the trigger.
The simulation showed me that I really haven't unlearned how to fly. Hit ratio 100% and an excellent flight. Dash would be proud of me.
I still thought of him and what he would have said or done in some situations. It would be too bad if I could just forget him, after all that was between us and what he meant to me.
They said that I can climb in my X-wing again and that I'm fully operational. Wedge and Gavin were really looking forward to flying with me again.
I was burning to fly into combat and to show it the Imps. And I was pretty sure that Luke would be terrified about how I've changed.
There was only one goal for me to send as much Imps to their deaths as I could before they would kill me. I had nothing to lose.
But then came all different than expected. They didn't want to let me fly.
Somehow they had managed to gain access to my diary.
Admiral Ackbar had personally taken care of my case. I still hear his words: "You are a danger to yourself and others, Lieutenant Darklighter.
There's no place for pilots who are seeking their personal revenge neither in the Alliance nor in Rogue Squadron.
Your judgment is clouded by your severe personal loss. It would reckless to let you fly missions. To be honest, you doesn't look healthy, Lieutenant. We will send you to Ithor for recreation."
I left the command center. Admiral Ackbar was right I didn't feel healthy. For some time I threw up nearly every morning.
It was ironic that they wanted to send me to Ithor - Dash and I had planned to marry there.