Confessions of a Broken Heart| Spoken Word
Confessions of a Broken Heart| Spoken Word shortstorybash17 stories

nocturnalprismMy work is a prism of my convictions
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I must confess, I still believe

Confessions of a Broken Heart| Spoken Word

by nocturnalprism

Thump. Thump. Lub-dub boom.

The symptoms of you Didn't take very long to appear: Dry mouth. Overactive pulse. Blank mind, whose thoughts Trickled down my neck And stained my clothes In the form of sweat.

My heart was pulled from my chest to my throat And out onto my sleeve like A corsage without an accompanying Boutonnière. And it went:

Thump. Thump. Lub-dub boom.

At first, I didn't think much of it. Getting the flu was more likely Than falling for you, Right? (sighs) But I suppose that's how all love stories start anyway.

I'd seen you in the school hallway many times. But one day, you looked different.

For the first time, I noticed the features That would make anyone jealous: Chiseled nose, dimpled cheeks, The flamboyance in the way you Stood. Walked. Talked.

Not even a fool would say that there was flair better than yours.

You were the epitome of perfection, The paragon of subtle grace. I worshipped you.

Thump. Thump. Lub-dub boom.

"How are you?" (chuckles) I don't even know why I asked When I followed you on every social media you had:

Snapchat. Reddit. Facebook. Twitter. G+. Pinterest. IG. Tinder.

Tap, tap, like, like, Retweet, swipe right Was my life for the rest of that day And every one since.

With every passing moment I found myself growing more And more obsessed with you.

I was consumed by the thought of you, The thought of you with me, The thought of us.

I envisioned our future together, With your hand in mine, My heart in yours, Our beings one.

I, I- (blushes) I imagined the day When you would gaze at me The same way I gazed at you And tell me that I was the only one You would ever care for.

I savoured the feeling of your name On the tip of my tongue And the whirlwind of emotions that followed.

Thump. Thump. Lub-dub rip.

A bit of my heart tore. I was spreading myself too thin, Slowly being weighed down By my 'imagination'. But I resisted. I didn't care; I was safe in the confines of my feelings.

I wouldn't let a small, stupid tear Ruin my relationship with you. I didn't care that I didn't know what to do. I didn't care that all the frenzy inside Was starting drive me insane.

Because amidst all the mayhem, I could see That everything converged to, Well, You.

It was you who was pulling me back From the edge of utter chaos. It was you who kept me alive.

I escaped reality. I fell in love with the idea of you.

Thump. Thump. Lub-dub rip.

The strain of my heart Was starting to become hard to bear With every passing day, Minute, Second.

I ignored it. 'It wasn't your fault you were so stunning. It wasn't your fault I was ensnared by your charisma.

It wasn't your fault I found myself catching my breath Every time you passed.' I tried to convince myself.

But soon, I found myself to be overwhelmed By all these thoughts and questions and feelings, So I decided to let them all out by writing. And I wrote, And wrote, And wrote.

When I finished, I felt a sense of relief sweep over me. I was free-

The frustration I felt at acting nonchalant Every time you smiled; The annoyance I felt at keeping A blank face every time we talked When inside I was dying for you to notice me- It was all out.

I put the journal with my feelings In my locker And left with a light head.

The thing was, I didn't lock my door. And your 'friend' noticed that.

I walked into school the next day Eagerly searching for your face In the crowd.

And I saw your face. Everywhere.

Posters of my journal entries were put up On the walls, on the notice boards: They were even taped onto lockers. Everyone seemed to be holding one.

When I walked in, everyone fell silent. The crowd parted as I made my way down the hallway. I could feel the whispers of rumours suffocate me, And the stares burn into my soul.

But only one made me Freeze.

The symptoms of you Didn't take very long to appear: Dry mouth. Overactive pulse. Blank mind, whose thoughts Trickled down my neck And stained my clothes In the form of sins.

I never thought that the first time you would properly look at me Your eyes would be filled with such disbelief. Your gaze wasn't what I pictured it to be.

Thump. Thump. Lub-dub RIP

Went my flimsy paper heart With you in it.

A year passed since that incident. (frustrated sigh) It's sad, really, how I ever thought That I would be the one to win your love. But I have one thing to say:

Don't fall in love. Please. Not because I still want you, But because I want to save you From what you put me through.

You might never know the sound of a heartbreak. You might never hear the screams behind silent eyes. You might never experience the pain of an unrequited love. You might want to keep it that way.

I can still feel it, you know. The void you left in me. In the most random of times, I can feel it ache. The shadows on my face Are proof enough That things haven't been the same.

I'm still trapped in a state of mind Where I keep thinking of what we could've been Had I shut my door that day. Don't fall in love, Because it's only a matter of time before:

Thump. Thump. Lub-dub-

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