Full of disappointment and shame, how could I have made such a mistake, how could I be so stupid? I had to go and screw it up, didn’t I? We practiced so hard, so long and all for what?
For nothing. I don’t understand why failure seems to cling to me like I’m it’s best friend. I don’t understand why everything has to be against me, everything I do only makes things worse.
Why is the world against me? What did I do wrong? I let her down, I let us down.
Couldn’t just one thing I cared about go right for me, just one thing? I knew the lines so why did I mess them up? I knew what to say but for some reason, those words didn’t come out.
I played it over and over again, I set it up in my mind I knew how it would go but I didn’t know the outcome.
That didn’t matter to me I was gonna be proud at the end of this, I was gonna work so hard that it would feel like I just won a million dollars. It didn’t end like that.
Another dream turned to dust.