It feels like I am sinking deeper and deeper into a hole that I won't be able to get out of.
I know that what I am doing with my life is just wishful dreaming but I can't seem to stop.
I don’t want to stop.
I want ever thing to stay the same.
No I want everything to be how it used to be.
To when I didn’t have to worry about failing out of college.
To when I didn't think I was just wasting my life.
To when I was carefree and bold and not at all what I am now.
Whatever that is that I have become.
I hate it. I simply hate it.
I hate me most of all.
How weak and scared I am, I don’t want to be like this anymore.
But what else can I do?
I'm to much of a coward to change.
And so I keep going.
Like a robot. Like a puppet.
And I just can't stop.