Too Personal
Too Personal not-as-planned stories

mollycat13 #Self-Lover
Autoplay OFF   •   a year ago
By far the worst job interview in the history!

Too Personal

I walked into my first job interview. My dream job was soon to be mine. I had no doubt that I was going to rock this!

"This is the room that you will go into to be interviewed," the lady from the front desk said. She motioned to the door to the right of us. I smiled.

"Thanks!" I said, then walked into the room. When I got into the room the girl that was about to interview me was on the phone.

"NO!" She screamed. I jumped, and was about to leave the room when she motioned me to sit in the chair across from her.

"I don't need to get my warts burned off!" she said. "The cream works fine!" I shifted uncomfortably in my chair, and I couldn't help to notice a wart on her right hand.

I gagged the slightest bit, but not big enough for her to see. "Look, I gotta go," she said. She put her phone down and smiled at me.

I smiled back, but it was kind of hard to without staring at her hand. "Hi!" she said. "My name is Emm Bayon." She turned her name plaque to face me.

"What's yours?" she asked. "Uh, my name is Jaqlynn Hugo," I said. "Oh, Jacquelynn with a 'q', very pretty!" Emm said.

"Thank you!" I said. "Now let's get started with the interview!" she said. "I'm looking at your resume, and-" the phone started to ring. "Oh, I better take this," Emm said.

I nodded, and stayed silent. "Yes dear?" she said into the phone. " Silence. "I know honey, poison ivy doesn't feel good... NO, DON'T put itch cream there!"

I shifted again, harder this time. "Yes honey, I haveta finish this interview, and then I'll be home. Don't put any cream on ok? Bye!"

She put the phone down. "Where were we?" she asked. "The interview ma'am," I said.

"Oh yes, I see that you are trying for the role manager's assistant, and by your resume, you look perfect for the job I only have one ques-" Emm was interrupted by her phone again.

She looked at it. "Oh, God. Sorry I have to take this too." I tried to smile.

"What Bryan! I thought you said that you would never talk to me again!" She screamed. She looked destructive and almost inhumane.

"No we can't get re-married! What is wrong with you?!" She yelled into the phone. I was about to tell her to stop making calls when she started to scream.

"SHUT UP! If you want to do something for your family go pick up your daughter, and tell her how to properly out on itch cream, and monitor her!" She had this devil glare look on and she was blazing it on the chair next to me.

"Ok, pick up your daughter and stop bothering me! Ok, bye!" Emm out the phone down and acted like I wasn't there.

"Uh, ma'am, Emm, the interview," I said quietly. "Oh yes!" she said. "Like I was saying your resume looks perfect, but have you worked anywhere else before here?"

"Well actually-" I started. The phone rang. Emm looked at the phone. "I'm so sorry Jacquelynn, I really have to take this one! she said. Now I was starting to get annoyed.

All I came here for was a job interview, I didn't come to hear her life story. "Jamie, I really gotta go, this better be quick," she said.

"WHAT!!!! YOUR HAND WAS EATEN BY A BOA!" She yelled, so loud that it shook the place. She was silent for a long time, and her frightened look turned into a hatred one.

"That's not funny, dude," She said, I thought she would be madder at that, but then the fireballs came. "Yeah, honey, just ice it, it hurts when you pinch stuff. Oh, dad picked you up, ok... WHY DID HE TELL YOU TO SUCK YOU HAND?" she yelled.

"Now you have cold-sores all over your hand?! Arrrg! Lotion your hand, and I will be home in fifteen minutes. Ok bye!" Emm said.

"Ok!" she said. "Did you have any prior jobs?" "No," I said. Annoyed and grossed out. "Ok, what school did you go to?" "I-" the phone rang.

Of course she picked it up. "Hi mom," she said. "No, I don't... no sorry, I haven't shaved in a while-" "That tears it!" I shouted. I stood up, and a book flew off her desk.

"I came here for a job interview, not a life story! I don't care about your ex-husband, your son with cold sores all over the place, your daughter that doesn't know how to use itch cream, you that haven't shaved your legs for a while, or even your wart problem!" I yelled.

She was about to speak but I cut her off, "You can keep my resume so you know what you are missing. Once I'm out of this room I'm never coming back!"

"And trust me," I said. "Anyone else would love to hire me, so if you want to call me, I'll give you my work number!" I yelled. "Because I'll get one in a heartbeat!" I started to walk out.

"Jacquelynn! Wait!" Emm said. "I'm done waiting," I said. "Jacquelynn!" she yelled, chasing after me.

I walked out the door, and the front desk lady confronted me. "What's wrong?" she asked. "Ask Emm Bayon!" I said, storming away. I heard the front desk lady speak to Emm, who was chasing after me.

"Emm, what's wrong?" the front desk lady asked. "Let's talk later," Emm said. She said it so sadly I almost thought about turning back, but I kept striding forward. I was leaving that building and never EVER coming back.

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