I felt my blade go into my skin.
I winced as I cut too deep again.
For some reason, I felt like I could never win my mental war.
I never cried, a tear never fell when I wanted to.
Pain washed over my as I watched the blood drip from my arm to my desk.
Would anyone know?
I wrapped it up, then cleaned my desk.
Johnny would never have to know.
He expected a happy girlfriend too meet him at the door or in the kitchen every evening.
I wasn't going to let him down.
But deep inside, I felt guilty, like I was doing something wrong.
I heard John's voice call from the door: "Baby, I'm home!"
I pulled on a sweater, covering the new cut.
Then I went down the stairs to greet him.
He hugged me, then told me he wanted to talk with me for a little while.
So I nodded, and followed him to the living room.
"Sorry, Johnathan, but dinner's going to be late... I lost track of time cleaning." I said, looking down at my hands.
John nodded, then took my hands in his. His dark blue eyes looked at me sadly.
Did he know?
"Eithna, hun, I know what you're doing. Please stop. I'm here for you, and you can forget all about that crappy life you had, okay?"
I shook my head.
"You don't need tears to relieve pain. You need someone to love you." John said, squeezing my hand. "Can you stop, please? Just for me."
I nodded, smiling slightly.
"Let's go make some dinner." He said, kissing my forehead.
Thank you, @JohnathanSparrow for everything. XOX -You're Lovette