I could hear my heart beat pounding in my head. I could feel my blood rushing to every part of my body. My mind raced to a thousand different thoughts.
What is happening? Why is it happening? A part of me wanted to let go and be free but another part of me wanted to hold on and never leave.
I could hear the sirens blaring, louder and louder as it came closer, but all I could see where dark grey clouds.
Suddenly my mind came back and I heard a voice calling to me. “Ma’am, can you hear me?” I looked over to see a man trying to pry the passenger door open.
He slowly took me out of the car and placed me on a stretcher. My mind wandered so much that I couldn’t think straight. The shock of it all left me speechless.
“What is your name?” the man asked faintly. But no matter how hard I tried nothing came out. The only sign of emotion that came out was a single tear that ran down my face.
The vehicle stopped and the man stood up and grabbed my hand, he looked at me and said “Don’t worry; I’ll make sure you are taken care of.” Still with no expression I squeezed his hand.
The man rushes me into the hospital. Everything seemed to have an echo and felt like I was in a tunnel. I was rushed to a white room with bright lights.
I could hear people talking but I couldn’t make sense out of anything. HELP ME PLEASE. I screamed in my head. I could feel a gut wrenching pain shoot through my stomach.
I looked down to notice a giant piece of metal sticking out of my stomach.
I began to panic, my breathing became heavy, my hands began to shake and my heart felt like it was about to jump out of my chest.
Everyone surrounded me, then a woman placed a mask over my face and within seconds the bright room became darker then night.
When I woke up I was in another room. This room was slightly lit and quiet. A nurse and the man who saved me came into the room. “Good morning, how are you feeling?” asked the man.
I went to speak but only a couple words came out. “What... Happened?” I still could not put together what had actually happened.
The man told me everything that had happened the night before and said that a truck ran a red light and t-boned our car. He told me that my husband did not make it.
My mind raced back to the last moment I remembered. My husband’s head was bleeding, he was unconscious and lifeless.
I broke down and cried out, I felt a sharp pain in my chest; my breath began to feel heavy yet faint. The world goes quiet, my mind goes quiet. I shut my eyes to block everything out.
I had nothing left to feel. As the days passed I fell into a dark hole. Emptiness, sorrow, hatred. Every emotion that came to me made my stomach turn and my heart hurt. How could this happen?