STRENGTH I DON'T NEED
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michaelschulzeCommunity member
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago

STRENGTH I DON'T NEED

by michaelschulze

MY STRENGTH IS WHAT IS DISTROYING ME

AND IT IS ALSO WHAT IS KEEPING ME ALIVE YOU SEE

NOT THAT THE THAUGH OF DEATH BOTHERS ME

BUT JUST FOR A WHILE I WOULD LIKE TO SEE SOME HAPPYNESS INSIDE OF ME

I THINK IT WOULD LOOK ........... GOOD ON ME ........

INSTEAD OF THE SADNESS THAT IS CONSUMING ME DISTROYING ALL WHERE LIFE SHOULD BE

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a year agoReply
Bernard I appreciate your comments it may come down to beginners luck as i have only been written any of these works for the two months so I welcome your criticism

bernardtwindwilGranddad & story teller, tomthepo8.com
a year agoReply
This was melancholy. I have seen better from your pen. I wonder if you had too much emotional investment here. The message is very clear and well written. I don't know if it was because of the new commaful format or not but the verses seemed a touch awkward. Otherwise it was an excellent poem.