Yesterday, I tore out every page of all my old notebooks, dating all way back to sixth grade year.
Pages filled with his name, and memories I’ve never spoken.
I let go of the things holding me back, specifically the love for me you always lacked.
There’s not a word to describe how it felt, other than feeling like I was finally released from some kind of living hell.
I took my scissors and I cut 5 year old songs that now have no meaning.
Every sentence released into the void that once had me reeling.
All my old pessimistic thoughts, anger and frustration and the feeling of distraught that once had my heart aching.
I put on my music from 2014, letting go of the past and accepting this new side of me.
The better version of myself, who really cares about my mental health.
Now I see my worth, and I know that I’m strong.
I wouldn’t have gotten through it if I didn’t move along.
Words have power, and now they’re not held over me. I won’t think back to the boxes in my closet full of secrets and embarrassment.
I don’t need to worry, I’m now my own heroine.