The truth is I know my keeper, some label them soul mate. How many people can actually say that? They know for sure who that person is! You know what else is becoming truth? We’ll never get together.
“Did you cheat”? “Did you betray”? “They are already taken aren’t they”? “Money the issue”?
Nope, nope and no. Incorrect assumptions. Simply isn’t the truth. So I have been told. I don’t know what it is. It’s got be something divine. Maybe her ancestors or my ancestors or both are trying to protect us/me or she from making a mistake. What’s keeping us apart?
This truth (the more it is realised) hasn’t set me free. Quite the opposite - it has caged me. Caged my mind like our ancestors who suffered. Caged like a circus animal. Trapped. I’ve seen the light, handled the glare but can’t seem to walk towards it. All the other black queens are lights but not to my gloomy prisoner.
I know my soul mate but I can’t do anything about it. The truth is, I wish I never met her. I’d have another fundamental - freedom. The prison cell isn’t lonely. I speak with thought, roll dice with regret, go to bed with dreams, wake up to despair.
I made mistakes, she made mistakes and right now we are making a bigger mistake. Another fundamental - mistake. A soulmate can be a close friend. Not for me - I’m in too deep.
Having my light shine on me faint, in my cage is the definition of insanity. Darkness is seeming like a new fundamental.