marinmacro**&P/$/o /e/- t ry -!@
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago


by a lost friend

Really, I'm not sure...

Is this? Or is this not another step up?

Today, I...

I looked in the mirror.

Really, yes! I know you can't​ believe it!

But there's more to it than 'looking in a mirror'

1. I had to fight

I struggled against myself to step out of bed. I woke up with all too many demons and monkey swimming and crawling​ on me.

2. Each step was a labour​

It was difficult to even look forwards.

3. Looking down,

I prepared myself. I had sat there a few minutes telling myself, reminding, convincing my ill brain that what it was about to see wasn't what everyone else sees. It wasn't me?

4. Then I looked

I looked up.

I screamed. I shook. I cried for help me as I ran.

I ran away . I only saw for seconds.

I'm not too proud of what I saw.

I saw someone fat. Someone obese, covered in imperfections and scars. I don't know who it was, but it wouldn't have been me.

They say...

The scale says 112. The tape measure says 5'4". The people say I look fine.

So why can't I see it that way?

but still...

I looked...

That's​ all that matters right?

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5 months agoReply
This spoke to me so much I'm going through the same thing ( we even have almost the same measures) Great poem Hope ur doing better

marinmacro**&P/$/o /e/- t ry -!@
a year agoReply
@jondough It sure is.

marinmacro**&P/$/o /e/- t ry -!@
a year agoReply
@bernardtwindwil Thank you so much.

bernardtwindwilGold CommaGranddad & story teller,
a year agoReply
This was a sensitive insight into appearance disorders which lead to eating disorders. You gracious ability to share thoughts and feeling with others may help many others. You free verse was magnificent. It brought all those emotionally charged words so easily to the reader. This was a wonderful piece.

jondoughreach for the stars
a year agoReply
ahh it's a battle :(