You were my everything and that was the issue.
I loved hearing you play,
each note was a reminder of how perfect we were for each other.
Why did you love me? I’ve never loved myself.
My self-destruction took over me,
as you were buying the ring to spend the rest of our lives together.
I fucked up,
my numbness inhaled my soul
as you were getting ready to kiss me forever.
You bought me red roses,
I spilled my blood over them to make them redder.
You bought me a notebook,
I’d write on it with the petals dipped in blood.
You told me you loved me,
I turned around and kissed someone else.
You drank beer,
and I took shots of your own pureness.
With every “I love you”,
came the razor to my veins,
digging deeper and deeper looking for an answer
That wasn’t going to be found in my blood.