A Slap On Titan: An Opinion at 3:57 am
A Slap On Titan: An Opinion at 3:57 am swearing stories
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kindagaybro
kindagaybro need me an "i❤️ hot moms" shirt
Autoplay OFF   •   2 months ago
i honestly do't know if i should've kept this in the drafts or not lol
yes i was actually awake for 22 hours straight, i'm cool like that

A Slap On Titan: An Opinion at 3:57 am

the only negative fact about it is that it is offensive but when being watched at the ass crack of o' thirty, it's pretty fucking hilarious (i was fuckin LOSING it man)

like a scene i just watched was when eren has been put in the dungeon or sum and erwin and levi are just fuckin watching eren sleep but the conversation is so fucking great when you've been awake for 22 hours straight

the convo is as follows:

"Wait you're Commander Erwin, and you're, you're Captain Levi! Oh my God you guys are my heros!" "Well would you look at that, Erwin? We're his heroes." Seriously! I'm like your biggest fan!" "He probably has posters of us in his roo-" "I do!"

"Teenage boys usually have posters of girls in his room, he" has us" "That means nothing!" "Imagine him just jacking it every night to your face" "Levi, stop" "Just GOING in, just THROTTLING that rooster shooting LOADS all over those bushy eyebrows of yours"

"What?" (i feel i should clarify that eren said this) "Are you picturing it, Erwin?" "Levi!" "Are you picturing it, Erwin? 'Cause I've got a pretty VIVID IMAGE in my head" *cue some other crap* eren also goes off about how "[he'll] kill all titans and the world will know [him] as Eren Jeager" and such

and levi thinks that "jeager" being eren's last name is really unfortunate (and fucking hilarious) bc his mom was the most well-known whore and literally says "JEAGER BOMB" unironically so

one of the best things about this is, levi was drunk the whole conversation

this has been in my drafts for 3 days.... welp until i post next, assume i'm dead, lads

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