Once upon a time there was a pig named Jeremy who could walk on just his two front hooves. He made lots of money for his family by traveling throughout the country side with a circus.
People came from all walks of life to see this fat bottomed hog walk all funny.
One politician saw the show and wept. He was so in awe. "I'm going to quit the business! I will never be able to top such a spectacle!"
Eventually the people with real money came along and started offering the circus organizers big bucks to acquire Jeremy the Pig.
The organizers refused at first, but after some negotiations they finally agreed to part ways with Jeremy.
Legend has it that the business men offered 50 million dollars and a string of islands in the Caribbean.
Jeremy was taken to New York City on a barge. There he was dolled up and became the official mascot for the McDonald's Restaurant chain.
He was positioned out front of their flagship joint in Times Square. Jeremy enjoyed the new gig at first, and so did the tourists, but after a while he became ill.
All he was fed were hamburgers and Diet Coke. His bottom had swelled up to the size of a Cadillac.
He could no longer stand on his front hooves for more than 2 seconds at a time, and he had to get a running start to do so.
It was bizarre to see, and slightly unsettling, however the local drunks took great joy in watching the performance.
One foggy morning the world changed forever. Young David Letterman was walking the streets of New York City with his entourage and tiger at his side.
This tiger was hungry that morning and so Dave decided to allow his tiger to go off leash and find some breakfast. The large cat came back with Jeremy's tail hanging out of his mouth.
The story was front page around the globe and now there are two statues of Jeremy, one in Times Square and the other outside of the stable where he was born in Mississauga.