This is a letter I know you'll probably never read;
But I wrote it anyway.
I stopped writing love poems when I realized I didn't know how to love;
Tried to fit in the descriptions but even the commas left me out;
If hearts had permanent locks-
I'd lock mine-
And throw away the keys;
I'd freeze every feeling from my life-
Coz I'd be better without them!
But even the coldest hearts have a way of melting,
And broken hearts have a way of healing...
So here I am,
Counting the beats of my heart as I slowly loose count,
My head going haywire from flashes of your smile;
I close my eyes wishing you were here with me...
So I would not have to snuggle my blanket when lost in the illusion of your embrace;
I want to hate myself for drowning in thoughts of you,
But I can't help it...
You look like my tomorrow-
And you feel like my whole life;
It's like I've always had you yet I don't have you.
I'm in love with your favorite song,
Everytime it plays...
I feel you in the beats and;
The lyrics paint a picture of you.
You're so alive in my mind-
That I lie on the floor smiling to myself;
My favorite movie playing on the ceiling
And I guess you already know its you.
The distance between us is unbeatable and I know I can never get close;
I've never felt closer to you.
The sun rises with your eyes...
And the wind blows with your scent;
Your body lies in every beauty I behold;
You are my favorite book!
But every evening I watch the sunset with my smile,
The night is kind enough to show me that you're really not here-
And if you ever happen to read this,
I want you to know that thinking of you is my favorite drink,
That the only lullaby that can get me to sleep is your face in my eyes-
Sometimes I sneak out of my dreams to live with you.
Wishing that I could sleep forever with you stuck in my dreams-
But a dead heart knows no dream,
So I'll live to hurt and dream another night.
If only you knew how long I've been waiting,
If only you knew how much I need you;
I've written many books about you in my head;
The many nights I've spent awake missing you have become a part of me,
And the days I've been lost looking for you...
I know life would be easier if I just looked the other way and let you fade away-
But I also know that I want to look at you.
No matter how hard I deny it;
I want to look at you!
I really do.
Sometimes I tell myself it's all in my head,
That one day my heart will wake up to a different tune-
And my eyes would be glued to another screen,
But deep down I know it's just you.
The one I long to be with-
To have and to hold as long as I've got hands;
To want and to love with all the fierceness of passion;
It's just you.
The one I'd look in the eyes and get lost in the smile...
The one I'd look at when I'm all gray and still feel like the first time.
So when you kiss me,
I won't hold my breath so I can breath from your nose-
And be one with you.
When you touch me,
I'll close my eyes and let go of the world-
Coz I'd rather be in yours.
I know life with you won't be easy,
But I'd rather the pain with you than without you.
Better the world hate me but you love me!
I just want you to love me; here; with me,
Can you do that?
Wherever your heart is,
Can you feel me?
I may be too dull for you to notice;
But can you see my heart?
I've loved you without knowing you;
I've held onto you in despair;
I stopped believing in love;
But I still believe in you.
I don't know about love anymore.
I can't explain how you're still a part of me;
Or why I can't let go of you;
Maybe I'm a freak,
Maybe I'm obsessed,
Maybe it's love-
I really don't know;
But I feel like I'm stuck thinking about you.
Time is passing by and you're not here,
Will you ever be here?
Or will I pass out with the passing time and never wake up to see you pass me?
My heart is pushing me to believe that I'll find you someday;
That no matter how long it takes you'll find me;
That even then my heart would still be beating the same-
But this is exhausting!
A long dream can turn into a nightmare
And right now my body is getting weak;
Partly because I'm feeling you-
Mostly because I'm bleak without you here.
So if we ever meet,
I hope you'll love me too.
I've always loved you;
And I will always love you.
In the event we never meet,
It will hurt but I'll have to admit that I was just a dreamer...
A hopeless romantic;
were just another beautiful dream...
Too perfect to be real.