It is a cruel specter, mental illness.
So many forms, unique like snowflakes,
but hideous, and hard, and difficult.
It is not beautiful, or pretty at all.
It is so very painful, yet invisible.
Stigmatized, it holds you back.
Being held back, doesn’t help.
It is a battle, that often can’t be won.
For me, anxiety, depression, self harm,
thoughts of suicide, I can’t focus.
It will never go away from my mind,
and I cannot remember when it came.
Self doubt, it makes me hate me,
to feel weak and oh so helpless.
Every time I make some progress,
I end up set back again and again.
My medication list is so very long,
an incredible cost just to function,
and I still find it so very impossible,
to get through even the simplest days.
It is my curse, and my burden,
to carry it with me through life,
this horrific beast that hurts me,
and haunts all my waking hours.