Harry Potter, The Angry Gay Wizard Who Lived - Part 2
Harry Potter, The Angry Gay Wizard Who Lived - Part 2 harrypotter stories
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harrypotterParody, not officially affliliated
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Hogwarts gets me excited. On many levels.

Harry Potter, The Angry Gay Wizard Who Lived - Part 2

So now we're at Hogwarts. I've met the cute red head. The nerdy girl. And the fucking old dude who I'm pretty sure thinks I'm cute.

Oh wait. Did I tell you about this Draco Malfoy guy? He's one crazy mothafucka. When his mouth is shut, he's kinda cute. But the guy is unbearable otherwise.

Imagine the richest skum you know. And the person you most want to punch in the face. That's Draco Malfoy.

First thing every new student has to do is get sorted into a house by a talking hat.

There are 4 houses. That's too many names for me to remember tbh. But all you need to know is that Gryffindor is where the heros are. And Slytherin is for the douchebags.

So yeah....the way you get put into these "houses" is through this talking hat that reads your mind. Idk who the fuck came up with this shit.

jk jk <-- i'm just kidding, and JK's also the person who came up with this crap. Anyway.....I'm in Gryffindor with the red head and the nerd girl.

Douchebag McDouchster (aka Draco Malfoy) ends up in Slytherin. (duh)

So yea......school starts. I try to make a move on red head, but the guy can't take a hint for his life. The only stick he cares about is his wand.

And that's when I saw Snape......10/10. I kinda like them pale and zombie looking.

But he seemed more interested in spanking the red head than me. Damn I was so jealous.

Bare in mind this was before I knew he had the hots for my Mom at one point.

So yeah.....things have been kinda boring so far. But more to come when I talk about the mothafucka with no nose. I always forget his name.

Till next time.

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