Tuesday, August 12th, 2017, 9:18 PM
Unfortunately, we still cannot contact Jimin. I feel like Ive called his parents and visited the hospital millions of times.
Ive been thinking, well, maybe he is at another hospital, but he couldn't be because he isn't allowed to leave the area for a month because he needs to be monitored.
The hospital would be alerted right away if he left too. There is no reason to leave anyway. Yes, I finally checked his house, he's not there either.
I have no idea on where he could possibly be. This is just getting me more and more worried. His phone is also off. What next, he disappears for good?
Wednesday, August 20th, 2017, 7:14 PM
I've never found the idea of sexual harassment great. I mean, who would right? You never really think about the topic in general or even think it could happen to you.
"Oh no, this would never happen, im just thinking crazy". Until it does, and when it happens, you are just in so much shock, it's quite crazy.
No matter how big or small the situation is, it will always be mind baffling to you. Of course though, the greater it is, the more trauma you will be in.
A topic that also, I wouldn't think I would be writing about in my journal. I try and keep it family friendly to a point, so If someone ever found this, They wouldn't think Im weird or anything.
But, I just need an outlet to rant on. Going to other people would be too much of a chore as crying and talking about an occurrence that they most likely dont care about, would bore them.
I don't think they would be too fond of a rape victim also sitting across from them. Would they call me disgusting? That I deserved it? 'You were asking for it.
Stop going around telling lies too, Jimin'. That's why Ive isolated myself. Took a trip to another city for a while. Cut off my detector on my ankle. The hospital won't find me this way.
If I happen to pass out again or my heart starts killing me and I die, It would be just pure luck. Questionable If I do ever come back In one piece. Already a piece of me has withered away.
Im hoping that it never comes back too. Or is it too late? Is it too late for me to even be saved? Im dying, every minute, and every second, of every day. Im getting weaker every millisecond.
One day I'll just fall apart.
It's too late.
Monday, August 31st, 2017, 6:19 AM
"This morning in the Dalseo district of Daegu, a 19-year-old boy named 'Park Jimin' from
northern Busan was found barely breathing, laying on the ground by ****** street. He was
clutching a journal and some of his personal belongings such as keys, and wallet, no phone
being found. Apparently, he was heading towards ***** cemetery
but suddenly collapsed onto the ground. Netizens dont know when or how this happened
but we are suspecting it was earlier this morning around 3 AM seeming he was seen
leaving a hotel 30 minutes prior. Around this part of town, nobody was seen beside him
so there are no witnesses before he was found. No information about him besides his
name, residence and age have been found with him. His picture will also be blurred for the
public. If you happen to know 'Park Jimin', call the police department and arrange a
meeting. Thank you for your time, and on to the next segment".
Wednesday, September 29th, 2017, 3:45 AM
He is gone
Jimin is gone.
After the incident when he went missing, nobody was able to figure out why he left. Nobody whatsoever.
Jungkook, his parents, and I have been searching around for answers but none have been given. We have asked the police in both cities but nothing has been found.
Jimin was in a coma for almost a whole month. Passed out, skin white, pale, his breathing slowing down every day, and we could see it. I knew this day would come, I knew.
But I tried to ignore the thought as best as I could. Who would want their best friend to die, out of the blue also? Jungkook has been awfully quiet the whole time.
It makes me think, does he know something that I do not? I don't want to put any of the blame on him but I can't help it.
Before we knew, Jimin was gone, just a couple minutes ago I knew he was still alive. Maybe not well, but alive.
Jimin had one wish for me though, one wish for Jungkook to know and I do not have a clue on how to tell him. Look at what life does. Takes away others in the blink of an eye.
Sunday, October 13th, 2017, 1:14 PM
It fucking hurts to know that the whole time during his sickness and pain, I was the one thing on his mind, every day and every second. That he wanted me to be healthy for him.
He wanted my happiness other than his. Even if he was dying, he wanted me to be ok. It also hurts to know that I didn't acknowledge his existence the whole time, only towards the end.
I never knew, I never did. He always stayed in the back during school, never came out for lunch, hidden away the whole time.
If only I searched the darkness, in the little places and then I could have found him sooner. Maybe I could have made him happier.
Although I don't really know what I have to offer because I'm not all that. Im just an ordinary guy, living a normal life. I still don't understand why he took interest in me.
I just wish he could have found someone else that could have provided him with everything instead of wasting his last and every breath on me.
I am fortunate to have had someone who thought of me that way though. If I could go back, if there was a way to turn back time, I would speak to him. I would love him like he loved me.