A long, long time ago in a scary, scary galaxy...
After leaving the sloppy planet Saturn, a group of men fly toward a distant speck. The speck gradually resolves into a fake, space hut.
Civil war strikes the galaxy, which is ruled by Alice Jolie, a skinny goblin capable of theft and even assassination.
Terrified, a fluffy pixie known as Morwenna Parker flees the Empire, with her protector, Alex Pitt.
They head for Cardiff on the planet Neptune. When they finally arrive, a fight breaks out. Pitt uses his scary gun to defend Morwenna.
Pitt and Pixie Morwenna decide it's time to leave Neptune and steal a lorry to shoot their way out.
They encounter a tribe of youths. Pitt is attacked and the pixie is captured by the youths and taken back to Cardiff.
Pitt must fight to save Pixie Morwenna but when he accidentally unearths a cosy map, the entire future of the scary, sloppy galaxy is at stake.