Your memories are mine-Part 2
Your memories are mine-Part 2 memories stories
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fiafrex2001
fiafrex2001 Community member
Autoplay OFF   •   3 months ago
Our past-defines who we are, today. But what if it didn't? What if you were given a chance to rewrite your life-from scratch...would you do it?

Even if it meant losing somebody-you loved...while they were still alive?

Would you do it?


PART 2.

Your memories are mine-Part 2

-----

"How are you feeling now?", his "therapist" asked him for what seemed like the millionth time.

He sighed, "okay", he answered mechanically...he didn't want to do this, but he was pressured to.

So there he was, sitting across from a bespectacled woman...trying to understand his guilt and trying to

overcome it.

Trying and failing.

"So have you made any progress, yet?", she asked. At his blank expression she continued, "Thomas...you

need to try...try forgiving yourself...try to forget-".

"Wait what?", He felt the anger rising at these words.

Every...fucking time...everybody told him to "forget".

They didn't realize that he wanted to lose his memories more than anything else...he wanted to be in

that bed, in that hospital...instead of her.

"You want me to...", he stuttered, "What do you mean?"

"I'm saying..."

"No...let me tell you what that means! I am a murderer...I may not have taken her life...but I did change

it, for the worse may I add!", he continued before she could interrupt, "Would you say the same thing to

a rapist...to "forgive" himself for stealing some poor soul's innocence...to a terrorist....for cutting short

lives...to a thief...for taking what's not his", he took a deep breath, trying to keep his voice under control.

"Because...that's what I am! A rapist...for taking away her chance at a normal life. A murderer...for

removing some precious years from her life...a terrorist...for haunting her household with the image of

her, lying on the road, blood dripping from her broken body....a thief, for taking her...", he gasped, eyes

stinging, "heart for my own".

The room fell into silence as the therapist surveyed the broken man before her...mentally counting the

seconds left before this session ended and she could finally have her lunch break.

"Why do you blame yourself so much?", she asked softly...she had a reputation to maintain and wasn't

going to let a love sick loon spoil it.

"Because I...because...", he struggled to find the words

.

The therapist mentally smirked, gotcha!!!

"Well.... That's why you see-".

"Because I had promised to keep her safe", he cut her off, in a low voice, "I had promised to keep her-",

his voice broke, "HOW CAN I EXPECT HER TO LOVE ME, WHEN I'VE HURT HER, THIS WAY? HOW CAN I EXPECT HER TO LOOK AT ME THE WAY SHE USED TO-WHEN I AM THE ONE WHO......".

"Thomas", the therapist prompted...genuinely scared for her patient.

"I feel like I'm drowning, doctor. Every single day, I feel the currents in the ocean of my guilt, dragging

me under, cutting off my breath...I'm trying to...trying to stay afloat....but-", he was silent for a long time.

"I don't have a reason to survive....anymore".

---------------------------------------------

He was at the reunion, in the midst of known and unknown faces...feeling their sympathetic glances at

him...hearing their whispers as they talked about the existential mess that he was.

They all knew about what he had done-and while they couldn't do anything about it, at the behest of her parents...they could "feel", his pain.

They couldn't....but that's okay!

He was used to this shit and was doing fine....

Until she stepped in.

For a minute he could only gape at her...her long, blonde hair, falling from her head in waves...her sea

green eyes...eyes that had once looked at him with love and adoration...were fixated on the man on her

side. Her smile was just as beautiful as he remembered. A tiny scar on her forehead was the only physical sign left from that night-it was on the same spot where he had kissed her, that night....

Tom couldn't stop a whimper from escaping his mouth as he looked at her, past the huge crowd that lay

between him and her. She looked...looked so happy, so beautiful...so....

Happy, safe, unhurt.

His brain screamed at him to leave but what scared him the most.

Was his heart...which wanted him to leave...forever from her life.

All the scars, his heart bore...she bore the same-except she was oblivious to them, while he knew them as well as he knew-the back of HER hand.

He just wanted her to be happy...and if that was with someone else.....well, he could fade away- content with the sight of her smile, shining through like the sun.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"How are you?...how long has it been?...who's your boyfriend?"

She wasn't sure what she was doing here...familiar faces that seemed like strangers to her...unknown

voices and sympathetic glances.

What the hell was she doing here?

And then all of a sudden, a voice said, "Excuse me!!".

Why did that voice seem so familiar? So warm...so...comforting....

She looked around her...searching for the "voice", but the crowd that had gathered around her, full of

nameless, unneeded people...prevented her from seeing the person she WANTED to meet.

But he was long gone.

After searching for a few more seconds, she felt a hand on her shoulder...it was her "boyfriend".

"Hey....you okay?".

She thought about it...her parents had told her that she had lost the worst of her memories...that, her

life was better now, than it had ever been. She had met him at a cafe and a few weeks later, they were a

couple...she wasn't sure about it, but the look of joy on her parents faces, barred her from expressing

any doubts. He was a good guy, looking after her, talking to her....but he didn't...feel, right.

There was a gaping hole in her heart, that she didn't know how to fill...an absence, that she couldn't

identify...a memory, that lay just beyond her reach...a smile, that warmed her heart whenever she was

in distress.

Suddenly, she felt like a prisoner...in a jail, built up by her parents and friends...her visitors seemed blank

and colorless...she kept waiting, for that one person, who would waltz into her life...and refill the meter

wide hole in her heart.

She kept waiting...

And waiting...but in the meantime...

"Yeah, I'm okay!", was all that-she could say.

And so it was, two souls that were meant for each other...were now, meters apart

.

One, crying over the other.

The other...not knowing how to...cry for a "stranger"

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Thank you so much for reading!!!

If you haven't read part 1-here's the link-https://commaful.com/play/fiafrex2001/your-memories-are-mine-part-1/

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