WATER OFF A DUCK'S BACK
From the 3rd diary entry of Stewy Lemmon's childhood adventures.
This week's fun times and great adventures with Smoochy started at the small village pond, just down the road from my home.
Which remember, is nestled amongst the trees on a hill in a little country town called, 'Shimmerleedimmerlee'.
While down at the small village pond, I was feeding Buck the Duck, the wild duck that I have been feeding since I was about four years old.
I noticed the water level had dropped down, since my last visit to the pond.
I was worried the small village pond may not have enough water in it for Buck the Duck to swim in and drink his daily water.
Soon, I was getting hungry, and I also had to feed Smoochy and Buck the Duck some of my Super Duper Triple Cheese sandwiches,
made with a smidgen of strawberry jam and a small spread of vegemite between each layer of cheese.
My mum had packed along with the sandwiches a bottle of berry juice and small cut up pieces of apple and banana,
a small bunch of green grapes and lots of watermelon sliced into little triangle shapes. All placed together inside a clear plastic bag.
Before opening the bag you should always turn the bag just three times upside down while at the same time moving all of your fingers between the fruit,
from side to side (a bit like playing a trumpet) but with a nervous twitch, I guess) then turn the bag left to right five times only but never ever right to left.
There you have it, my creation I call the "Colourful Take-Away Fruit-Blast in a BAG".
Then, once that part is done you can eat it to your heart's content or until you are as full as a goog.
If you like a bit more adventure, you can also perform the easy and exciting, but very secret add-on part which is called the JiggyJiggy Side Kick Extra.
I will give you the secret JiggyJiggy Side Kick Extra instructions at the end of today's fun adventure diary entry, but only if you can keep it a secret.
It's one of my favourite afternoon creations of all time.
Ok, back to the day's fun adventure.
That afternoon was extremely hot and I decided to take Smoochy home for a lie down in the backyard hammock which is hanging up between the two large trees and under the shade,
near dad's unusually built and outrageously painted outback backyard shed, to cool down and rest.
I told my dad Archie, that the water level in the village pond was at its lowest I have ever seen it in all of my years being there feeding Buck the Duck.
Dad said he would take a look when he had time and let me know what's going on.
The next week I went down to the nearly empty village pond, but Buck the Duck was nowhere to be seen.
When dad got home from work he told me he had driven past the pond on the way to work that morning and told me the pond was losing its water because of the consistent hot weather we had
been having lately. Dad said the water was evaporating rapidly and that's why Buck the Duck has left to find another home with plenty of water to swim in and drink from.
I said, we have been feeding him since I was about four years old. It also feels like we have lost part of our family.
Dad said, 'Don't worry, I'll think of something, just give me a few days to work it out'.
So off dad went, into his unusually built and outrageously painted outback backyard shed, to start thinking of a solution and try and get Buck the Duck back home where he belongs.
He looked inside the grouse little pet mouse house he built for Smoochy and studied the tubing he designed for Smoochy to get from the top level down to the lower floor.
All of a sudden, it clicked inside dad's very smart head. He went to the hardware shop and purchased a variety of things.
Busy for days and even working at night in his unusually built and outrageously painted outback backyard shed.
The day had arrived and dad took Smoochy and I down to the small and empty village pond, to show us what he had done.
He had built a maze of small, medium and large round pipes made out of new coloured plastic and he had even painted them with cool cosmic colours with unusual designs.
He had looped and even double looped the three different coloured size pipes as they went down the hill and into the small village pond.
Dad knew that the hot sun would keep evaporating the water from the small village pond, so he used his brains and connected the pipes up to the homes bathroom and kitchen drainage water pipes.
He had even installed a filter to pump clean recycled clear water back into the pond.
Dad told us, the small green coloured tube was for the clean recycled water and Smoochy was to use the medium, yellow coloured tube to whizz down and finally the largest red coloured tube,
was for the whole family and friends to use. I named dad's creation the "Tremendously Terrific Triple Tumbling Turning Travelling Tubes".
After days of having fun, I slid down for the last time, via the large red coloured tube to swim in the pond and guess who bobbed his head up from the water?
It was my good old friend, Buck the Duck. I was so happy to have our friendly small village pond duck, back at last.
Oh I almost forgot to tell you the instructions for the add-on JiggyJiggy Side Kick Extra creation. Have you got a pen and paper at the ready?
Here it is. Hold the bag upside down and make a small hole in the very right-hand corner at the bottom of the bag, get a straw and put it in the hole.
Then place a cup near the bag and slowly pour the juice through the straw into the cup. Once done take the straw out and place it in the cup.
Then make the small hole into a much bigger hole and empty the rest into your bowl.
So now you have fruit in a bowl that is not too soggy anymore from the "Colourful Take-Away Fruit-Blast in a BAG" and if you could follow the instructions correctly you also have a cup
of fruit juice made from the JiggyJiggy Side Kick Extra creation or for fun you can call it, if you can pronounce it.
There you have it, but remember to keep it a secret ok?