Santa Claus Is Coming To Town

DISCLAIMER: I think Santa is a lovely person. This is for a rap battle where my prompt was "bad santa". The rap battle never happened... but I felt like I should share this anyway :)

Inside the workshop the elves are slaving all day

Inside the workshop the elves are slaving all day Making children's toys but they're not getting paid

No cash from the big man

No cash from the big man with his unnaturally long life-span

Santa Claus is coming to town

Santa Claus is coming to town Not your savior, he's a sneaky creeping clown

Little thing called breaking and entering

Little thing called breaking and entering goes against the law

Little thing called breaking and entering goes against the law But who cares if Santa climbs down your chimney

Little thing called breaking and entering goes against the law But who cares if Santa climbs down your chimney to shove cookies in his voracious maw?

Santa Claus is coming to town

Santa Claus is coming to town Wearing his big ol' tyrant crown

He works one day a year

He works one day a year the other days he spends drinking beer

Judging little children and threatening them with coal

Judging little children and threatening them with coal Sounds to me like Santa's a troll

Santa-lovers, you're going down

Santa-lovers, you're going down 'Cause we all know I'm winning this rap showdown

To my rap battle opponent- I think it was @alostwriter: I dare you to respond. -@elleseng