Things Every Mature High School Student Says

I'm old enough to go without a sitter

unless you get Lisa. SHE can baby sit me any day

I'm too old for a bed time

I hooked up with the hottest girl in school!

Just don't ask her. Or ask any questions about it. Or ask for proof. Or ask any of her friends to confirm. I won't tell any details. Ok fine. I didn't

I went to a college party and was super cool there

And I saw alcohol. I was sooooo cool

Why isn't school more like the movies?

SuperBad and American Pie? Where the nerds get the girl and stuff?

I'm too old for middle school clothes....I need cool stuff

A job? But....I'm only a kid....