chelseyCommunity member
Autoplay OFF  •  a year ago
Part of a story I wrote many years ago.


by chelsey

"Claire, come on you need to get out of the rain!"

Kyle yelled out to the park across the street. When she didn’t reply he ran into the rain looking for her. His eyes wide in fear and his hair clinging to his face.

“Claire where are you?"He asked looking for any sign of her.

He didn’t see her sitting where she normally sat since that night. Why did it have to rain? he thought to himself as he looked all along the path. The green of the park started to blend into one.

"K...Ky….” a weak voice said from behind a bush.

Kyle ran toward the bush and saw Claire was all scratched with blood covering her. Her normally bright green eyes here dull and unseeing and her hair was covered in a crown of twigs and leaves.

“What happened?” he asked as he bent down to help her up.

“It’s my fault.” Claire breathed her eyes squinted together either in pain or in sorrow. “What is your fault Claire?” he asked having just got her into a sitting position. “Everything” she said.

“Nothing that happened that day was your fault." Kyle said.

He was going to get her over this if it was the last thing he did. “You don’t see the looks I get every day, the whispers behind my back. I am blamed for everything and they are right. If only I.

“If anything happened differently you would be gone.

We will talk about this later we need to look at your cuts and get you cleaned up.” Claire sighed “Maybe everyone would be better if I had died.” she whispered to herself.

“I thought things where getting better.” Kyle thought.

"What am I going to do now? It has been a year and a half and I was only given two years to help her." Kyle started to pace until he heard the squeak of the water being turned off.

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a year agoReply
@bernardtwindwil I am actually also french (I'm very mixed). Moms are defiantly better at guilt than anyone. I sometimes get 'its ok I was only in labor for over a day and I was ripped open but if you don't want to get me water thats fine.' After my test tomorrow I will start working on it again.

bernardtwindwilGold CommaGranddad & story teller,
a year agoReply
@chelsey That was a humor laden reply. My late mother-in-law was an Italian guilt maestro she passed this art to my wife who despite her graduate degrees in the sciences still believes she can invoke the mal ochio. My sons call me to tell me that "Mom is trying to guilt trip me," If you were French or Irish, the story would end tragically. As you are Italian-Catholic-Texan, it must have a happy ending.

a year agoReply
@bernardtwindwil I'm from Texas, I am Catholic, and I am Italian guilt does not work on me. Other than that I am taking chemistry for 5 weeks so if I have time I will work on the story. I just need to figure out if this ends well or not.

bernardtwindwilGold CommaGranddad & story teller,
a year agoReply
@chelsey IO turn 72 on August 21, how about a birthday present? Please finish it, my days are numbered. I'm an old cowboy who is running out of round ups.

chromiumSilver CommaI like to think I'm amazing
a year agoReply
this is fun :)

a year agoReply
@sydney Thanks

a year agoReply
@bernardtwindwil Whenever it is written. Although I wrote this years ago I never wrote more of it.

sydneyVerifiedco-creator of Commaful
a year agoReply
Great start 😀 so much going on in this bit of dialogue

bernardtwindwilGold CommaGranddad & story teller,
a year agoReply
Good beginning. I was getting involved on the first page. Great graphics. When is the rest of the story coming?

a year agoReply
@lisa Thanks!