ICU A Frozen Moment Written By Alyssa Champagne
The moment that I had been preparing myself for finally arrived.
I stayed strong and walked down the warm, brightly lit hospital corridor with my head held high, knowing that I could handle what I was about to see. I passed by room after room.
Each containing a patient recovering from their recent surgery. They all were awake and talking to their nurses which only made me feel better about what I was on my way to see. I felt ready.
I felt strong. I felt like everything was okay, but nothing could have prepared me for this moment.
I turned the corner to see a glass room with sky-blue curtains dangling from the inside. I took a deep breath and pulled the curtain back. There it was. The thing that I was afraid of the most.
A life-less body. Suddenly, the sky-blue curtains began to match the color of the body’s skin. The bright lights dimmed. The room was no longer warm.
I could just barely hear the sobs over the sound of my heart beating. Each beat feeling like my heart was being ripped out of my chest.
I couldn’t help but think that I could have prevented this. Questions were rushing through my head along with pure guilt that I was not there sooner.
The more I thought about what I could have done the louder the room became. The machines buzzing and beeping louder and louder. The room began spinning slowly in a counterclockwise motion.
I wanted to scream, I wanted to run, I wanted to be angry at God for allowing this to happen. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t be angry. But I could cry.
I remained in the doorway, unable to move any closer to the person I no longer recognized with tears uncontrollably slipping down my pale face onto the cold, dark floor.
That is when I realized, this is it. This is the last time I will see my mom.