You've decided to take a shower: lately you have been feeling really down, so you thought this might help you feel better.
You step in, turn on the water, wait until it gets warm, then get under it.
As you slowly get wet, you focus on the song playing: you left your phone right outside the shower and put on a playlist of sad songs, even if you know it'll just make you feel worse,
that the only kind of music you want to listen to right now.
Your mind starts to race: you think about everything that has happened lately, about the stress, the pressure,
about the things you're supposed to do that you swore you were gonna do but never got round to it, about the decisions you made and the ones you'll have to make soon, you feel so overwhelmed,
sometimes you think you'll crack under all this weight, you know you will, but so far you've been stronger than you thought.
You feel like you have no one to talk to, either because you know they won't understand,
because you don't want to be a burden or because they have it worse than you do and you know you should look on the bright side but you can't seem to find one.
A shiver goes down your spine: you adjust the water so it gets hotter and let it fall on you, hoping that it will wash away all your feelings.
A love song is now playing and your mind starts to wander once more: you think about your friends and wonder if they'll stay by your side all your life or if one day they're going to leave you,
about that person that you haven't spoken to in a long time and wonder if how and where they are now,
about that person that once was your whole world and wonder if they actually ever loved you or if it was just a lie.
Suddenly you feel so alone: you adjust the water again, it gets hot, so hot it almost burns but you don't care, you need to feel its warmth, you need something to make you feel less empty.
You look up, the water hits your face: you've started to cry but didn't even notice.
Tears and water stream down your cheeks as, just for a second, a horrible thought hits you, but you shake your head, shaking it away as well.
You decide you've been in here long enough, turn off the water, step out and wrap yourself in a towel.
You go to your room and sit on your bed, staring blankly at the void, you can still hear the music playing from the bathroom: the songs says everything will be okay and you know it will,
but today is not that day.