"Hello, IT. Have you tried turning it off and on again?" - Roy
"God damn these electric sex pants!" - Douglas Reynholm
"People. What a bunch of bastards." - Roy
"Two eyes. That's the best amount of eyes." - Moss
"Faaaatheeeeeeeeeeeeeer!" - Douglas Reynholm
"Emails. Sending emails. Receiving emails. Deleting emails... I could go on." - Jen
"I like being weird. Weird is all I've got. That, and my sweet style." - Moss
"I came here to drink milk and kick ass. And I've just finished my milk." - Moss
"A FIRE?! AT A SEA PARKS?! THAT'S THE WEIRDEST THING I'VE EVER HEARD!" - Roy
"Ich bin ein Nerd." - Jen
"I'm sorry, are you from the past?" - Roy
"I am a giddy goat." - Moss
"Motherflippers think everything's a motherflipping joke." - Moss
Good morning, that's a nice tnetennba. - Maurice Moss
Hooray. He’s kicked the ball. Now the ball’s over there. That man has it now. That’s an interesting development. Maybe he’ll kick the ball.
He has indeed and apparently that deserves a round of applause. - Maurice Moss
With all due respect, John, I am head of IT. If you type "Google" into Google, you can break the Internet. - Jen
You there! Computer man! Fix my pants. - Douglas Reynholm
*at a funeral* Jen: "just say, 'I'm sorry for your loss' and move on." Roy: "I'm sorry for your loss. Move on."
Woman: "I like your glasses." Moss: "They're not for sale." She laughs. Moss: "Laugh all you want, they're still not for sale."
"I'll just put it here with the rest of the fire." - Moss
"I'm not a window cleaner!" - Roy
"Well, I'm the boss... Head Honcho. El Numero Uno. Mr. Big. The Godfather. Lord of the Rings. The Bourne... Identity. Er... Taxi Driver. Jaws. I forgot the question quite a while back.
Who are you, again?" - Douglas
"We have two lovely children, Zenith and Quasar." - Moss
"Hey! What is Jen doing with the Internet?" - Roy
"The elders of the Internet know who I am?" - Jen
Listen, Alistair, I just wanted to say, I'm not a window cleaner. No, no, I work in IT. Yeah, yeah, with computers and all that. Macs? No, I just really work with Windows. Hello? - Roy
Moss: What kind of operating system does it use? Bomb Disposal: It's er... Vista. Moss: We're going to die!
"Why are you giving me the secret signal to shut up?" - Moss
[laughing] Book recommendation? I can't read. Yeah, I don't know what it is, but women's slacks give me the confidence I need to survive in a tough business world.
They're lighter, airier and less constrictive than men's trousers. And I'm pretty sure it doesn't make me a transvestite - Douglas Reynholm
I need your mind on the job, not thinking about sexy sex all the time. - The incomparable Mr. Reynholm.
"I'm disabled." - Roy
I can barely contain myself even just remembering this scene--or in fact this entire episode. "Are you a gay man????!" - Jen
original by franksars