The American bathroom controversy​
The American bathroom  controversy​ stories

bernardtwindwilGranddad & story teller,
Autoplay OFF  •  2 years ago

The American bathroom controversy​

by bernardtwindwil

A Concise History of Crap in the 20th and 21st Centuries.

How we got to the palaces of poop we worship in America today. I feel safe knowing that evangelicals are monitoring my poop in order to save my eternal soul and keep me free from molestation.

When I was young we had a one holer

You were glad just to get there when it was vacant. Men, women, and the occasional critter all used the same facility. Gender did not matter. Warmth and smell mattered..

Public restrooms greater capacity

Even though capacity increased, the rules stayed the same. If you need it, use it. People still peed in gender neutral bushes. It was a society with freedom of poop.

After WWII we became modern.

Rules changed. Men's rooms and lady's rooms blossomed. A segregation of two genders and toilet paper. Privacy became supreme. The person in stall 2 had no idea who was in stall 1.

Luxury and excess emerged from a pile of crap

Status with luxury became more important than that which you were full of. It was noticed who came and went from these thrones.

Segregation meant crap could be equal but, separate.

This was the beginning of crap specific toileting. The religious folks thought that God was watching you pee. They were afraid that colored folks would rape white folks.

All XY chromosomes crap in the men's room XX in the lady's

The good religious folks from the old confederacy are protecting our souls from gender bending preverts who would corrupt our holy toilet water.

Do these look scary? I get to crap in the next stall.

I am amazed that women have never been raped before those heroic laws were enacted to specify toilets by chromosomal gender. I want my grandson to grow up in the next stall.

These women will be in the lady's room. I think.

Can you see the threat to me here? What if one of these girls crapped in the stall next to me? My masculinity would be threatened. My chainsaw would be confiscated and maybe my rifle.

DNA screening will be done and you will be tattooed. X or Y

This tattoo will be on your forehead and it will be unlawful to cover it or tamper with it in any way​. It would never do to threaten our species with a less stringent action.

Police will keep us safe.

In case voluntary efforts fail. The police will grope each toilet user to validate their gender package. This will assure our safety and eternal soul.

Just because it is rational does not mean it is Holey.

When venturing out of the confederacy, one's soul and body parts are in mortal danger. This will make it necessary to poop and pray at the same time.

Crap in Dixie where your soul is safe.

In Dixie, you can poop anywhere as long as your package is correct for the sign on the door. If someone switches the gender signs, they will be shot with an assault rifle.

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