Choke
Choke poison stories
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beautyfadesx
beautyfadesx Witch of all trades. Poet.
Autoplay OFF   •   9 months ago
Angst from 2012.

Choke

I know at 23, I should have the strength to stop all your words from affecting me so negatively

But you still speak so carelessly

And I let all your muttering get to me.

The venom you so maliciously spit infects me like a bug bite that insists to itch

And I don't have the willpower to leave it alone.

Every insult is repeated until the poison seeps deep, deeper into my bones

And I don't know how I still survive because I've tried all this time to find an antidote,

But - NOPE.

I'm alone, solitarily confined to my bedroom,

Uncomfortable in my own skin

Because with you I am sixteen all over again.

Insecure and unsure - volatile, ready to break

And you are capable of breaking me down in ways I never dreamed imaginable

And even with years of practice I still take the bait

Every time you wave one of my flaws in front of my face

NO EXCUSES, don't bother texting me attempting to explain,

IT'S USELESS - I threw my phone in a fit of rage

I'm still alone, busy learning how to cope and I hope when I'm 30 I'll finally be okay

Or you'll just

Choke.

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