Where’d I go with all this pain ?

Where’d 
I go with all this pain ? poem stories
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arcane_
arcane_ “ We write our stories on these walls “
Autoplay OFF   •   5 months ago
This piece of writing is so dear. Denying pain is weakness. Feeling it is divine. It’s okay to move with pain and not move on.

By: a.y.m

Where’d I go with all this pain ?

by

I was the gale steering the storm,

I was the gale steering the storm, with blood rushing in reckless as tides.

I wanted it all from the universe,

I wanted it all from the universe, with every glare of will burning inside.

I'd fight my wars unescorted,

I'd fight my wars unescorted, poulticed my own bruises,

I'd fight my wars unescorted, poulticed my own bruises, climbed the highest walls.

I always knew

'no force fed love, I always knew

'no force fed love, no sympathy, I always knew

'no force fed love, no sympathy, I always knew no such deceptive metaphors'.

I'd weaved my broken pieces together alone,

I'd weaved my broken pieces together alone, and admired as if an art.

I'd fall for the certainty that light prevails,

I'd fall for the certainty that light prevails, hold on to traces of hope till last.

I painted my self with hues of 'happy' ,

I painted my self with hues of 'happy' , burying grief deep in dark.

Been living in delusions that strongest ones move on,

Been living in delusions that strongest ones move on, they never fall apart.

And now, It has been years and years of dauntlessness,

And now, It has been years and years of dauntlessness, disguising fears,

And now, It has been years and years of dauntlessness, disguising fears, dancing while all mundane.

And now, as my World comes apart at it seams,

And now, as my World comes apart at it seams, where'd I go with all this pain ?

•••

It's exotic this time, no one fathoms,

It's exotic this time, no one fathoms, as if uncertainty struck vigorously

and remained.

My whole body aches with agony unparalleled,

My whole body aches with agony unparalleled, my mind twinge with words unsaid.

And as darkness fills up to brim,

And as darkness fills up to brim, each forgotten memory invades the room.

With silence uprooting,

With silence uprooting, unabridged sight of that night replays in loops.

Too tired to sleep, too tired to explain, too tired to get off my bed.

How'd you pull this arrow out ?

How'd you pull this arrow out ? How'd you bury a loved one without burying your own self?

And if I could, I will scream to all the strongest ones,

'Heal' , And if I could, I will scream to all the strongest ones,

'Heal' , 'Move on' , And if I could, I will scream to all the strongest ones,

'Heal' , 'Move on' , and 'Let go' And if I could, I will scream to all the strongest ones,

'Heal' , 'Move on' , and 'Let go' And if I could, I will scream to all the strongest ones, are all fabrications they told,

How'd you lose a part of yours’ and be again whole?

Perhaps, strength is to put out weaknesses and know it's fair to fall.

Perhaps, pain set one's heart to ‘move through’ and not 'move on'.

Thank Y'all Note : I've been writing for so long. It has always been an escape. A solace. Dwelling into the wild. In the past days, it was getting a little harder to hold on. Took not a many searches to get here. Unawarely, for the very first time put my words out there to complete strangers.

I am foreign to this family, and all I want is to say, I am utterly grateful to each and every precious soul here who read, loved and praised. with love, aliza.

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