It finally happened.
The zombie apocalypse.
If you're anything like me (read: a sci-fi/fantasy nerd), you've been preparing yourself for this eventuality for years.
All the zombie movies, wiki pages, and survival shows were finally going to come in handy!
I was prepared for the worst case scenario: the fast ones. Luckily, the virus that caused the zombification resulted in the much slower, easier to run from and kill, shufflers.
Panic ensued, of course, as the military did their best to quarantine infected areas and evacuate those that remained healthy.
The cities fell first, obviously.
While the shufflers were slow, they were relentless and had numbers on their side long before the CDC could confirm the first case; before the military could react.
They could indeed be killed by destroying the brain or removing the head, but the virus gave them properties unlike the zombies we've seen on screen to date.
First was the ability to continue living through extreme environments. The decay lasted long after the dead should have gotten dehydrated; fire wasn't nearly as effective as we all hoped, either.
The second was an innate, uncanny ability to track people down, wherever they were. It wasn't sound, scent, or even heat that tipped them off, so it seemed.
There was something else that drew them towards the living.
Fortunately for me, my friend's family has a lake house. And, as we all know, zombies can't swim; they simply lack the physical coordination.
I got there in time to make it onto the boat, and we all headed out to the island in the middle of the lake.
We'd have to start civilization anew there,
but there were plenty of resources in the lake and enough of us went camping (read: watched youtube survival videos) to figure out how to survive there.
We lived there for about a week before we saw the first shuffler on the edge of the lake. It was dusk, and we all laughed as it plunged into the water.
A few more showed up, and we started making it a drinking game with the rum we managed to carry with us. Eventually though, sleep took hold of us all.
I woke to the sound of my friend's wife screaming. Her cries were stopped short as a zombie bit into her neck, while another tackled my friend to the ground as he tried to save her.
I stood there, frozen, as they descended upon me in slow motion. In my final moments, I had a realization.
Zombies can't swim.
But they have no problem walking across the bottom of a lake.